My experience and tips for a better birthing experience.

 The miracle of life. 

Birthing a child has to be one of the most excruciating things I have ever felt. Of course, it's not the same for everyone, but my experience was one of the worst things my body has ever gone through. 

I wanted to share my experience with everyone and give a few tips and tricks that helped me get through it.

Contractions and labour:

I woke up on the 20th of July 2023, at around 5am. I had the worst cramps and didn't know how to position my body so it would calm down. I woke my partner up quickly, but he being himself was so slow and very groggy. I asked him to rub my lower back and it seemed like it was working because because the warmth of his hand was making the cramps go away. But, obviously, not long after that, the cramps started again.

At that time I knew I wasn't ready to give birth, mentally I was really not ready. So I did what anyone in my situation would do: I googled Braxton hicks contractions. I was trying to find any relation to Braxton hicks in comparison to the cramps I was feeling but the cramps didn't stop. I decided around 6 that I should get up and try doing something. That's when my partner called his mother and she assured me that I was in fact labour. 

Because I read many birthing stories in preparation, I knew that it would only be a few hours before I was in active labour. I told my partner that he should go to work and that I could handle it. My father-in-law stayed home with me and tried to distract me from the unbelievable pain I was in. I messaged my friends and asked them when they knew it was time to go to the hospital. My closest friend at the time told me that once I feel like I'm about to poop, that's when the baby is almost ready to come out. About an hour after she told me that, I felt it. Or at least I thought I did. I told my father-in-law and we rushed to the hospital. When the doctor examined me,  to my surprise, I was only 2 centimetres dilated. She told me that they'll move me to the labour room as soon as I'm 9 centimetres. In the meantime, they moved me to a room so I could wait until I was in active labour. Now, the next few hours, were the worst pain I experienced during my labour. The contractions felt like period cramps cranked up to a million. I am usually able to handle pain very well, my threshold is surprisingly high. But that was painful. I remember feeling like I needed to sleep like my entire body was on fire and then it would stop for a while. When I informed my partner that I was in the hospital, he went home and came to the hospital as soon as he could. When he saw me, I was lying on the little hospital bed, feeling like I could barely keep my eyes open. I was tired and in the worst pain I'd ever been in in my life. Shortly after he left, the doctor came to check how far dilated I was. 3 centimetres. After 4 whole hours of contractions, I was only 3 centimetres dilated. I received an injection for my pain which really helped. The contractions hurt a lot less and an hour later, the doctor came to see how far along I was again.

Finally, at 10cm, I was rushed to the labour room. Now I went from 3 cm to 10 in an hour, God would only know but I was so grateful and ready to start pushing. While being rushed to the labour room, I remember having to shout my partner's phone number to a nurse and him getting there in under 10 minutes. Now the pushing was the easiest part for me. I remember feeling a great deal of relief because I was able to push during each contraction. My partner being there with me, holding my hand the entire time was the best feeling. When our son finally breathed his first breath and screamed his first cry, my partner uttered words I'll never forget. Two simple words that brought tears to my eyes, "he's here".

My favourite part of that entire experience was seeing the love of my life holding our baby for the first time. I'll never forget how happy I was at that moment. 

A few things I believe got me through the experience:

 Walking

I tried my best to keep moving during labour, it helped me cope with the pain. It didn't completely take it away but it really distracted me from how bad the contractions were. 

Kneeling

While in the hospital room, I was feeling a heavy load of back pain and I remember reading somewhere that kneeling on the bed could help relieve some of the pain. And it did! I was grateful to even be able to keep loving because my entire body was exhausted. 

Focusing on my breathing 

I realized that I became so anxious with all the pain I was in and I wasn't sure I could handle it. So I focused on breathing slow and secure breaths. I repeated to words "inhale, exhale" with each breath I took and that helped so much during the later contractions.

Trying to keep conversations

While my partner was in the room, I tried to talk to him about things I'd need during the stay that I forgot to pack. His being there was already helping me cope and being able to talk to him kept my mind off the extreme pain I was in. 

Staying hydrated 

I had a handy little water bottle with me during the whole experience and it helped me stay hydrated. Labour caused my mouth to be dry and I wanted to have something to drink the whole time. Hydrating also helped me focus on something other than the pain I was in. 

Preserving my energy

I knew that once I was in active labour, I'd need all of my strength to push out the baby. Although my body was exhausted already, I knew I wouldn't be able to dose off with the contractions hitting me. So I would only occasionally get off the bed to walk a little, then I'd stretch and sit down for a while. This really helped in the long run because I was only in active labour for 30 minutes before my son came screaming into the world.

I really hope my story and advice resonate with some people. Feel free to ask any questions or leave any kind of commentary regarding your own stories. 

Live. Love. Grow